Life is a joke. It will jest until you die. Keep feeling really down lately, dunno why but it just feels like there is a burden in my heart. I been trying really hard to believe in people, trying so hard to feel again. But the more i try, the wierder my dreams become. Its the 2nd time i woke up with the same scenerio, i keep seeing both of them being burn to death. I cant rememeber what happen exactly but i think i dreamt that the sun was directly above(like directly), it just burnt them up. After that, i just woke up feeling damm retarded.

There is nothing i can do to help. I keep thinking about it, its so pointless to do it when none of them would trust me with anything. Well, i do deserve it considering how much i have been lieing my whole life. If there is a set amount of happiness one is entitled to, i think i used up mine long time ago.

Crying wont do anything
Bitching about it wont help
Talking about it wont help when you are creating another problem
Yup, in conclusion, nothing will help. Perhaps, this tiny piece of light called god might be able to. For now, i dun tink it will shine on me.

Already start to fade out of existance, a shadow cant live without light. There is this light still hanging around but the more i hang around her, the more i fall in love with her. Then everything will be back to zero. Need to keep my emotions in check, i have been doing it for 2 years already, just abit more before everything ends